While we’ve heard countless times how ah-mazing a prostate massage feels, it can be daunting AF to put a cheeky finger up your guy’s butt for the first time. Maybe you’re worried things could get a bit messy, or maybe you’re worried you’ll ‘do it wrong’. But if there is a fun, magical way to make bae feel different kinds of amazing, we’re all about digging deeper (couldn’t resist; I’m sorry). We decided to chat to Shaun, a 26-year-old homosexual from Johannesburg, to find out the where, how and why of a prostate massage.
Firstly, let’s start with an anatomy lesson. The prostate is a small, walnut-sized organ that helps create semen. Its depth differs from guy to guy. Sometimes, in the case of taller guys, it can be a bit deeper. But generally, I’d say it’s about 6,5cm deep or so, or the first two sections of your index finger.
The Nitty Gritty
You need to make peace with the fact that you’ll be exploring an anus. There is a chance things might get a little messy. However, while the anus is not known to be the cleanest of areas, it’s cleaner than you realise. Consider that the area you’ll be dabbling in is only utilised when there’s a visitor on its way out. So unless he needs to poop right then, it’ll most likely be clean. If you guys have discussed it before (which I’d recommend doing) instead of being spontaneous, it’ll give him time to make sure he’s squeaky clean.
YOU WILL NEED lube. Start with something like K-Y Jelly. The rectum is an incredibly sensitive area, so try avoiding lubricants packed with too many ingredients that you don’t recognise, as it could cause irritation. Do not go in dry or use spit.
The idea behind a prostate massage is to apply mild pressure by rubbing/massaging it. It’s a super-sensitive area, so you don’t need to go crazy by poking or prodding at it. If your guy is as new to this as you are, start small. Don’t whip out a strap-on or a butt-plug. A finger will do the trick.
While he’s lying on his back, with your palm facing up, slowly start putting your finger (which is clean and has a short and smoothly cut nail!) up his butt. Take your time and make sure there’s enough lube. Once it’s in, curl your finger upwards slightly in a ‘come here’ motion, until you feel his prostate. It feels like a walnut-sized bump, but it’s very smooth and soft to the touch.
While some men can come from prostate stimulation alone, many can’t. It could be a good idea to include a blow job in your new adventure. When he does come, he’ll experience an orgasm unlike any he’s had before. Be prepared, because he may come a lot harder than you (or he) are used to!
Enough With The Taboos
The mere fact that he’s comfortable enough to experiment with such things with you is amazing: he’s a keeper, honey. Trust me. The more often you two experiment with it, the more comfortable you’ll become and the more satisfaction you’ll both get from the experience.